These are not the emotions you are looking for

 Pregnancy will flood you with more emotions than you can handle. In the beginning, I had burst into tears at work one day, uncontrollable crying, for no reason! So much so that I had to leave work. My boss kept laughing at me, especially when, while on the phone with her, I realized I had left my banana at home and this resulted in the ugly crying and almost hyperventilating. 

This did not subside in any way, throughout the whole nine months, any little thing could set me off (Never ask my partner to confirm this, he will reference Jurassic park, fallen kingdom, and then make fun of me as I cry again.)

To my DISMAY, this continues to the day, 5-6 months after she arrived. I didn't think that everything would return to normal straight away, but come on! My beautiful baby girl is learning to roll over, she rolled so much that she rolled off her play mat, and bumped her head on the leg of the coffee table, not hard let's be clear, it was a little tap. But it made her cry, and it made me cry as I picked her up to comfort her. Why was I crying? she was fine, no blood, no bruising, just a little tap! I was crying harder than she was!! Big Momma bear turned into a wreck. 

My partner came home later that day and I told him what happened, and that I cried too, he laughed (as I'm sure you are now too) but instead of laughing with him as any normal person would, I got mad. I couldn't help it, I was mad at him, so much so I couldn't talk to him for about half an hour. There was no reason for it. I'm normally a very happy person, in our whole relationship, I think we have only argued once or twice. We laugh at everything and talk like normal rational people, but today, I was a horrible person. 

I reached out to some other mom friends of mine, the response was the same from all of them, You're still dealing with hormones, this will make you irrationally emotional. It takes longer than a few months for those to return to normal if they ever will. 

I spent two days apologizing to my partner, we both laugh now, he even makes fun of me for it. Good to know it happens to everyone, I'm not abnormal. 

#firsttimemom #newbaby #oldermom #momlife #parentingstruggles #mommyneedsabreak